Friday, March 26, 2010

See Her Soon

Thank you Lord for the gift of my children for it is through them that I am SO often reminded of your delicate love for my family and I.
Today in the car, I was chatting away with Ava and asking her lots of questions (it's her favorite "game" other than Old McDonald!) like, "Are you my sweetie?" To which she replied, "Yes!"
"Are you my cutie?"
And then I said, "Are you my angel?" She of course said, "Yes!" I then said, "Well you know Ava, you have another angel too. Our angel Victoria is our angel in Heaven. " What Ava said next was so simple, and even though I tried to hold them back, I started to cry as I relished in the truth of what she said. Ava said, "Yeah, we will see her soon." :Sigh: Man, I just miss her so much and sometimes soon just isn't soon enough and I really struggle with that. I tried to carry on our little conversation some more, but my mind was filled with the words my sweet little 2 and a half year old poured into my heart. "We will see her soon." Thank you God for speaking to me through Ava! Thank you for reminding me to continue seeking eternity every day. For knowing my heart so well to send me that consolation that I will someday see Victoria again. I love you.

Thursday, March 18, 2010


Well, I did it! A few weekends ago, I FINALLY was able to surprise my terribly-difficult-to-surprise husband! (Which is usually my fault because I usually accidentally spoil the surprise!) With the help of our wonderful friends, I threw him a SURPRISE 30th birthday party! I really got him too! He had noooo idea. I told him we were going out to dinner with our friends Branden and Lauri that night, so when we went to pick them up, he had no idea there was going to be a housefull of our dearest friends waiting for him inside. Since we are in an apartment right now, Branden and Lauri were so kind to let me use their house for the party. The theme was a "Dip party". Bobby has always had this idea of having a dip party where everyone comes and brings their favorite dip- cheese dip, spinach dip, hummus, veggie dip, etc etc. So he was extra thrilled when he realized he was finally getting to have his "Dip party" and of course we had to play the song "Da Dip"- you know, "When I dip, you dip, we dip!" :)
We all had the best time, and it was definitely a birthday to remember. I love you Bobby!

In every picture, I am just beaming...hahaha. I was sooo happy to surprise Bobby like this. It made me feel so good to pull something like that off for him because he is such a wonderful and loving husband and one of his favorite things is spending time with our friends. :)

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Our Night Owl...

Ohh Lucas, I do love you with ALL my heart, but must you wake up so much at night?? Like 3-5 times at night?? At least you are so charming and heart melting during the day that we quickly forget what a stinker you are at night! I mean, when you smile your big gummy smile at me in the morning and giggle your oh-so-infectious little laugh, how can I think about how ridiculously strong you are in the middle of the night when you arch your back and scream while I am trying to change your diaper and button the 5 darn buttons at the bottom of your pajamas?!

To say that we have tried most everything to aid you in creating a normal human sleeping routine at night would be an understatement. We lay you down awake with your passy and lovie after making sure your tummy is nice and full (but not too full because then you are grouchy and puke on us!) . Your daddy and I sing to you and kiss you and you fall asleep on your own. But for some reason, after about 2-3 hours, you wake up unable to find your passy (or the 3 other ones we have placed in there with you hoping that you WILL find it!). Usually after that, you wake up again about 1-2 hours later, but this time you put up a fight. You have even cried for 45 minutes straight once and STILL wanted our lovin' in the wee hours of the morning. Ohh Lucas, my sweet blue eyed little boy, you are so wonderfully made...but can you PLEASE reconsider your desire to sleep?? Your mommy and daddy will be so happy if you do.

Monday, March 1, 2010


Ok Vic, you got me! After the bright yellow Jeep wranglers comes the number 52. It was her favorite number, and we even incorporated it into her funeral which began at 10:52am- a silly detail that simply provided my family a glimpse of laughter that day. Anyways, I no longer see the jeeps as much, but now I cannot escape the number 52 (not that I am trying by any means!) I wish I could type and explain every random occasion this number has popped up for me, but it sure does make me smile every time. Like "52 ways to lose weight this year", or calling her cell phone just to hear her voice on her voicemail and realizing I called her at 9:52pm, or printing off the Christmas in Heaven poem for my friends at 10:52am or noticing my friend Lauri's son's little sweater has the number 52 on it (which she then gave to me- so thoughtful!). There are sooo many more, and maybe I will try to post them here and there, but I just had to share this fun little fact going on in my life right now!
And yes, Branden and Lauri- I promise I will make a collage of them!